Scene 1Beauty IS a Beast
1-7
( The play beings with the Narrators standing behind a ______ with a big book. The Narrators can read their lines.
Narrator 1: How is this story supposed to start? (Scratching their head) Oh yes. Once upon a time there was a princess named Beauty. She was prettier than anyone else in the kingdom.
Narrator 2: (pushes the other narrator away) But wait, that’s not really when the story started. It really started long ago, in a land far, far away… when Beauty was just a baby. Maybe we should start by saying twice upon a time…
Narrator 3: (pushes the other narrator away) Anyway… There was a royal family… the royal family of Taichung, who were kind and fair and led everyone out of the Dark Ages… by inventing the light bulb.
Narrator 1: (pushes the other narrator away) Just kidding. They were kind and fair rulers who did what was best for the people. As a reward, the fairy godmother decided to make their newborn daughter the most beautiful person in the world. But as you will soon see, making Beauty that way was a big mistake.
Narrator 2: (butts back in front) And since there was this problem, we now have 3 Fairy Godmothers trying to be the best Fairy God Mother in the Land
(Some peasants are chatting in the park. Beauty and her friends arrive at the park and the peasants start to talk about her. Both groups are on different sides of the stage.)
Peasants group
Peasant girl 1: Wow, look! It’s Princess Beauty!
Peasant boy 1: Where? Where?
Peasant boy 2: Over there! Isn’t she the most beautiful girl you have ever seen?
Peasant girl 2: Oh yes. She is prettier than all the other girls in the kingdom.
Peasant boy 3: She sure is(makes a growling sound)!
(Peasant girl 2 punches Peasant boy 3 in the shoulder)
Peasant boy 4: (dreamily) Look at her golden hair and her sparkling eyes and her…
Peasant girl 3: She really is very pretty.
Princess’ group
Beauty: Hey! What are you peasants staring at!
Friend 1: Oh Beauty, they are just admiring your… beauty.
Peasant Girl 2: Yes, we were just…
Beauty: You were just what? Staring! You were just staring at me! Well stop it! Why don’t you mind your own business! If you want to look at me you can pay me $100
Friend 2: Yes! Leave the princess alone and go back to collecting garbage!
(Beauty picks up some rocks and starts throwing them at the peasants and the peasants quickly run away)
Friend 3: Hey Beauty! That wasn’t very nice!
Beauty: Oh no?
Friend 2: No not really.
Beauty: Some friends you are. I’ll show you! GUARDS!!
(Three guards come rushing in)
Guard 1: You hollered..?
Beauty: Yes. These people here are no longer my friends. Take them away!
Guard 2: As you wish princess.
(Guards grab the friends.)
Beauty: And off with their heads!
Friends (together): Oh no! (I never said anything) (You’re so mean)
Guard 3: My pleasure, (yells)HOT POT head soup tonight everybody.
(Guards exit, taking the friends with them. Enter narrators.)
Narrator 4: As you can see. Beauty might have been beautiful but she wasn’t very nice.
Narrator 5: No not very nice at all.
Narrator 6: But she did have a younger sister. A sweet, kind and generous sister named Honor. (said slooooowly)
Narrator 7: Yeah but not as beautiful as….
Narrator 5: SHUT UP!!!!!! The King and Queen were planning a party her. They were hoping that the handsome Prince from Taipei would fall in love with sweet Honor and then marry her.
(Enter King, Queen and Honor)
King: We are going to have a party.
Honor: A party? Why?
Queen: To introduce you to Prince Handsome.
Honor: Prince Handsome (WOWWW)?
King: Yes. He is very handsome. He’s from Taipei.
Honor: But what about Beauty? Don’t you think the Prince will like Beauty more than me?
Queen: No, no. You are so nice Honor, much nicer than Beauty. What’s inside is much more important. We should have never let the fairy godmother change Beauty into the way she is.
King: We hope that you and Prince Handsome will be married. Now run along and get ready for the party.
(Honor exits one side of the stage skipping and the King and Queen exit the other side. Enter the Narrator and Beauty.)
Narrator 8: But unfortunately, Beauty heard about the party….
Beauty: Yes I did!
Narrator 8: And she wasn’t very happy.
Beauty: No. I’m not!
Narrator: 8 But remember Beauty, the party is not for you, it’s for your sister Honor.
Beauty: We’ll see about that. My sister may be nice but I am much more beautiful! Prince Handsome is going to like me better! All the boys do. Just look at me, what’s not to like????
(Song-You’re so Vain plays while she twirls around and 2 tailors run on stage and measure her up for a new dress/shoes etc…..)
(Beauty exits the stage rubbing her hands together saying look at meeee)
Narrator 9: So the following night was the party. It was the grandest party the kingdom had ever seen. Everyone was there. Including the two Princesses.
(Party scene. Everyone can be on stage at this point. Music is playing. People are dancing, chatting)
Party people group
Party person 1: Hey this is a great party.
Party person 2: It sure is. I heard a Prince was going to be here.
Party person 3: A prince?
Party person 4: Hey look! There his is. He’s over there with Princess Honor.
Prince Handsome and Honor come to the front
Prince Handsome: Oh Princess Honor, you are such a kind and sweet girl. I am so happy to be here with you tonight.
Honor: (Shyly)Well, I’m glad you are having such a nice time.
Party person 5: Look! Here comes the Beautiful Princess Beauty!
(Everyone at the party turns to see Beauty enter the stage, her friends are behind her fanning her etc– funny song perhaps? Beauty walks up to her sister and Handsome.)
Honor: Hello Beauty. I am glad you made it to the party. I was wondering where you were. You look amazing, as usual.
Beauty 2: Well I am sorry I can’t say the same for you. The party of yours is lame. The music is crappy, the food is crappy. (notices the Prince) Ohhhh he’s not crappy, who is this?
Honor: Beauty, I would like you to meet my new friend Prince Handsome from Taipei. Handsome this is my sister Beauty.
Handsome: Wow, you are beautiful. Really, really beautiful.(continues to stare at her)
Beauty 2: I know. Why don’t you come with me. This party is boring and, I hate to say this, but my sister is lame too.
Honor(sadly): How could you say something like that?
Beauty 2: It’s true! So, handsome who do you want?
Handsome: (smitten by Beauty’s beauty) Ummm… well….. I guess I’d have to say…
Queen: Beauty! What are you doing!
King: Yes! This party is for Honor! Honor is supposed to get the Prince. She is beautiful on the inside….unlike you. Honor is supposed to get the Prince.
Beauty 2: Well, the truth is. None of you are as Beautiful as me, and therefore, I can get whomever and whatever I want! So Handsome is coming with me!
Honor: Why are you being mean again?
Beauty 2: Don’t you get sick of being so nice? I think being beautiful is much more
fun.
Honor: You make me laugh sister.
Beauty 2: Well you make me sick!(pretends to stick finger in mouth and makes a gagging sound)
(Beauty 2 holds up her hand, Handsome takes it and they start to walk out)
King: (Yelling) You can’t……Start the Fairy God Mother’s music
Strange magical sound happens, everybody freezes except Beauty and 3 Fairy Godmothers appear(bumbling)
Scene 6FG
1 Beauty, you never stop we really
have to teach you a lesson.
FG 2 What should we do to her?
FG 3 Let’s all do something to her and see what happens.
(they all wave their wands at her to no avail as Grace floats buy(never smiling) looking them up and down and making notes on her evaluation sheets and leaves.) All FG look and shake their wands to see if they’re broken. Finally one shakes it(music comes out) and …
FG 3 ALLAPALOU I WILL MAKE AN INVISIBLE YOU….
Beauty 2: HAHA I can still see myself
FG 3 (Waves the wand again(different sound), 2 tailors come out and wrap
her up in a white sheet) There, that’s better
Tailor 1 Give me a big 5 matey, that was the best job yet hehe
Tailor 2 (gives him a high 5) now that we can’t see her let’s hope we don’t have to hear her either haha(they cover their ears as they run off the stage)
(FG 1 waves her wand and the party continues with music, dancing and chatting etc.)
Beauty 2 Hey, no one can see me …….. this will be fun.
(as the 3 FG’s watch in disbelief as Beauty walks around the party tripping people(who blame it on their friends, bump peoples arms as they’re about to drink and even pulls one person’s pants down. She gets away with it since she is invisible. Grace floats by again with a very angry face and keeps filling out the evaluations as she goes off the other side)
Narrator 10: The party has ended with everyone angry and accusing each other of tripping and bumping them. The 3 Fairy God Mothers are talking to
Beauty 2.
FG 1 That didn’t work so now you’re going to get it
Beauty 2 I loved that, can I stay invisible for awhile?
FG2 Never, we are going to teach you a valuable lesson that you will never
forget.
FG3 We are going to turn you into something you wished you never were
(Grace glides by again with evaluations) Get her girls………
( they run after beauty waving their wands at her, she runs screaming off
the stage)
Narrator: Well… they got her, got her good, hahaaha. We now
join the King, Queen, Handsome and Honor as they stroll through the
Royal Court Yard…..
King: Where can she be? She just disappeared
Queen: Honor , are you sure you don’t know where Beauty is?
Honor: No, I don’t have a clue, the last time I saw her she was trying to take
Mr. Handsome away from me…
Handsome: You know I wouldn’t have left with her, I was just being handsome, I
mean kind…..
King: We have to find her she would never go away for this long. Let’s keep looking.
Narrator: We now go outside the castle gates to see how hehehe Princess Beauty
hahaha is looking hahaha(walks off laughing to himself)
( this princess looks fat and ugly in the inflatable costume, wearing a Burger King Crown )
Princess Ugly: Look at me, what has happened to me? I weigh 200 kg’s and I can hardly walk. All I want to do is eat, I have to get back to the castle(Walks towards the castle gates) OPEN THE GATES GUARDS.
Guard 1 Who are you? Get out of here peasant
Guard 2 Yeah, leave before we start throwing rocks at you
Princess Ugly How dare you, I’m Princess Beauty
Guard 3: (laughing): Princess FAT Mountain Pig is more like it
Guard 1: Really, I’ve seen better looking monkeys
Princess Ugly: I’ll have you beheaded
Guard 3 And we’ll still look better then you
( the guards start pulling faces and making fun of her. She walks away sobbing even other peasants are making fun of her size)
Princess Ugly: (Starts walking off and drops to her knees, head in hands) What have I done, what have I done to deserve this?????
(Blind Man enters with a walking stick and sunglasses—Ugly has her back to him, still crying)
Blind Man: Now, now sweetie, what’s so bad.
Princess Ugly(still not looking at him): Leave me alone.
Blind man: Come on, nothing can be that bad.
Princess Ugly: I used to be the most beautiful girl in the world and now I’m just the
heaviest.
Blind Man (big smile): You look fine to me. Come here and let me give you a hug.(tries to help her up and his hands go all over her body). Holy cow!!!! YOU ARE HUGE!!!!! I can’t even give you a big hug. Maybe it’s a good thing I can’t see…..see you later(he walks off)
(King, Queen, Honor and Handsome come out-All together):
Beauty, what happened to you??
Handsome: (wipes his eye brow) whooo, glad I made the right choice here…
Princess Ugly: The Fairy Godmother’s made me so fat because I was so mean to everyone(in between sobs she ask if someone will take her to McDonalds)
King: You don’t need McDonald’s, You need the 3 Fairy GodMother’s.
(3 Fairy GodMother’s appear)
Queen: We appreciate your effort to humble our beauty and we think it has worked.
Princess Ugly: It has, I promise to be good forever and ever.
(Grace floats by in the background filling out evaluations)
All FGM’s: Okay, we’ll turn you back(they start waving their wands)
Narrator(walks out): Now you are all expecting a nice fairy-tale happy ending, but we wanted to make this real soooooooooooooo…………………
(The Fairy God Mother’s continue to wave their wand at Princess Ugly)
It’s all quiet and all you can hear is the psssssssssss of her deflating
Princess Ugly: (yelling) What happened? All I have is this loose skin eeeyyyaaahhhhhhhhh
(Grace comes across and up to the 3 FGM’s and finally speaks)
Grace: You are the lousiest Fairy God Mother’s I have ever seen. Here are your evaluations. Get Lost
(3 fairy God Mother’s leave arguing amongst themselves)
King: But what about Beauty? Can you change her back?????
Grace: No way, she deserves this for being so mean to everyone. However, I can bring her a nice husband. (She calls out and another ugly person comes out—could be a peasant or one of the guards redressed)
(Grace and the new couple leave, only King, Queen, Handsome and Honor are left)
Honor: Well, I guess that leaves you and me to get married Handsome. How about tomor….
Handsome: Nahhh, this place doesn’t suit me. I’m to beautiful and manly for this place. See you later.(walks off the stage)
King and Queen: (to Honor as they walk off the stage): Don’t worry, there’s another handsome prince in Hsinchu……………………………
THE END